Chained to the Algorithm…

Dear Instagram,

I love the internet. I love apps. I spend a majority of my life online whether for work or for leisure. I understand that things have to change at times. In fact, I don’t mind having to battle with algorithms and fork out the odd quid here and there to promote certain work related posts. But when you encroach on my “leisure scrolling” it becomes personal. I really only have 2 Instagram gripes but boy do they grind my gears….

1) How many times do I have to click ‘see fewer posts like this’ for you to get the picture about what I would really rather not see? Sidebar; don’t think I am in anyway overreacting here, I must have clicked that option a thousand times by now. Yet still the faces of my enemies and an abundance of melted cheese are the posts that are turning up in my suggested feed. I’m willing to forego the cheese (everyone loves cheese)

2) WHY oh WHY in my actual timeline of the people I choose to follow do you hold back posts from me??? Not entirely though, which would actually be more acceptable because at least then I wouldn’t know what I had missed, but NO you then slide them into my feed 17 HOURS LATER. What good is that to me SEVENTEEN HOURS LATER? How does this serve anyone well, 7TEEN HRS L8R?


For example; Mother’s Day in the U.S. was on Sunday 14th May, last night (Tuesday 16th) at 11pm I was seeing some of my American friends’ Mother’s Day posts for THE FIRST TIME. This meant that not only did I spend most of Sunday in a constant state of terror that I had forgotten actual Mother’s Day – I was also retraumatised by the appearance of new Mother’s Day posts LAST NIGHT. I am talking cold sweat panic. Only to remember that it was Tuesday and Mother’s Day is NEVER on a Tuesday and then I looked at the timestamp and had apoplexy all over again….

I asked some of my friends what they thought of the Instagram algorithm;

“I’m thinking of making an image just saying Dear Instagram, I hate your algorithm. And tagging them in it.”

“I want to punch it in the face”

“It’s a pity. Algorithm is such a cool word for something so shit.”

One just sent me…..


So, I know you probably have a reason for presenting things the way you do. I totally appreciate there is SCIENCE and NUMBERS and STUFF that you are following to increase performance and whatevs. But can you just let me see posts as they are posted? Even FB lets me do THAT….

Yours sincerely,


Ps. also the ease of accidental double tapping when you’re 6 months deep in someone else’s account – can that not be so easy?? #askingforafriend

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