I have an addiction…

Well okay, truth be told I have more than one addiction. I am addicted to Curly Wurly’s and my phone BUT the one that I have decided to write about is my latest love. YouTube makeup tutorials. I have spent DAYS of my life watching endless videos on halo eyes, cut creases, Ulta hauls, Sephora hauls. You name it, I have watched it. I have lost entire DAYS in one sitting. I have always been interested in makeup but I always stuck to the basics, foundation, powder, mascara – BOOM. Maybe a sweep of shadow on a night out. NOT ANYMORE. Since I stopped smoking I have spent all of my saved money on makeup. I am now doing full face on a daily basis and I feel so much better for it. I’m still treading a fine line when it comes to my eye choices as I seem to only be able to go full drag or nude with zero in between….. I highly recommend YouTube for anyone who wants to get a bit more confidence up when it comes to doing makeup. Soooo, in honour of this I have decided to share my faves with you. (Disclaimer: I am not a YouTuber fact boffin so I have no idea if these people are loved / hated / whatevs. I don’t care either, I just like their videos. So sue me…)

  1. Nikkie Tutorials

GAH she is my absolute fave. She is as pale as the day is long, as tall as a tree and has makeup skillz that are second to none. Nikkie is based in Holland and has been a YouTuber since 2009. Her videos range from pop video inspired tutorials to product reviews – check out The Power of Make Up as a good starting point. It was through watching Nikkie’s videos that I happened upon the next 3 dreamboats.

2. Jeffree Star

I first happened upon Jeffree Star in a makeup guru way when he popped up in a ‘Get Ready With…’ video on Nikkie’s channel. This was not the first time I had heard of him though. Back in my drag obsessed days he was quite the name and had released some music that I actually really liked. After leaving the music behind, Jeffree started his own makeup line which has taken the world by storm. His Beauty Killer and Androgyny palettes are on my list to snatch – plus my obsession with his Velour Liquid Lip collection is beyond a joke. Jeffree’s channel consists of tutorials, reviews, collabs and reveals and it’s also interspersed with vlogs of international adventures. Subscribe and sail away!

3. MannyMUA

Manny is the most adorable of all of the adorable humans. He is BFF’s with Jeffree Star and he has mad makeup skillz. His channel description is the best…

"This beauty channel is where I teach tutorials, create favorites    videos, tags, shenanigans that go on in my life, etc.I hope you guys can join me in this crazy adventure that is Youtube and the beauty   world. I am constantly learning and growing with you guys I believe  that men can wear makeup, teach makeup, and vlog about it just as    much as girls can and I am fighting for that equality with my channelSo subscribe to my channel if you're into that too!"

4. Laura Lee

Oh how I love thee. Laura Lee is definitely not my skin tone of paper so the products she uses would not be of any benefit to me whatsoever BUT I just love her entire being. Over the past week or so we were treated to her, Jeffree and Manny on a trip TOGETHER to St Tropez with Jouer Cosmetics. I DIED.  I’ve included my fave Laura Lee video below…..

I read so many comments that are beyond bitchy about what these vloggers spend their money on, how they make their money etc. Here’s the thing, why does anyone care?? So what if Jeffree Star wants to spend his money on a Chanel tennis racquet? SO. WHAT??

Anyhoo, I am also really into the Kat Von D artistry collective videos and have bagged myself so much of Kat Von D’s cosmetics line that I need another face to work with it all. I just ordered the Alchemist Palette and am counting down the days until it arrives!

So, there you have it! My faves! Please tell me if I am missing out on any other vloggers that I need to have in my life!!! Leave me a message in the comments below or hit me up on Twitter at @lindslikedthat xox

Chained to the Algorithm…

Dear Instagram,

I love the internet. I love apps. I spend a majority of my life online whether for work or for leisure. I understand that things have to change at times. In fact, I don’t mind having to battle with algorithms and fork out the odd quid here and there to promote certain work related posts. But when you encroach on my “leisure scrolling” it becomes personal. I really only have 2 Instagram gripes but boy do they grind my gears….

1) How many times do I have to click ‘see fewer posts like this’ for you to get the picture about what I would really rather not see? Sidebar; don’t think I am in anyway overreacting here, I must have clicked that option a thousand times by now. Yet still the faces of my enemies and an abundance of melted cheese are the posts that are turning up in my suggested feed. I’m willing to forego the cheese (everyone loves cheese)

2) WHY oh WHY in my actual timeline of the people I choose to follow do you hold back posts from me??? Not entirely though, which would actually be more acceptable because at least then I wouldn’t know what I had missed, but NO you then slide them into my feed 17 HOURS LATER. What good is that to me SEVENTEEN HOURS LATER? How does this serve anyone well, 7TEEN HRS L8R?

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For example; Mother’s Day in the U.S. was on Sunday 14th May, last night (Tuesday 16th) at 11pm I was seeing some of my American friends’ Mother’s Day posts for THE FIRST TIME. This meant that not only did I spend most of Sunday in a constant state of terror that I had forgotten actual Mother’s Day – I was also retraumatised by the appearance of new Mother’s Day posts LAST NIGHT. I am talking cold sweat panic. Only to remember that it was Tuesday and Mother’s Day is NEVER on a Tuesday and then I looked at the timestamp and had apoplexy all over again….

I asked some of my friends what they thought of the Instagram algorithm;

“I’m thinking of making an image just saying Dear Instagram, I hate your algorithm. And tagging them in it.”

“I want to punch it in the face”

“It’s a pity. Algorithm is such a cool word for something so shit.”

One just sent me…..

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So, I know you probably have a reason for presenting things the way you do. I totally appreciate there is SCIENCE and NUMBERS and STUFF that you are following to increase performance and whatevs. But can you just let me see posts as they are posted? Even FB lets me do THAT….

Yours sincerely,

Lindsey

Ps. also the ease of accidental double tapping when you’re 6 months deep in someone else’s account – can that not be so easy?? #askingforafriend

I’m an Accidental Hugger

Well hello! I have been pondering over whether or not to tell you this story but due to events in the late part of last week I feel like I need to share. Consider it less of a blog post and more of a hazard warning if you are ever in my vicinity.

So, anyone who knows me knows that I’m a hugger. I LOVE HUGS. They are the next best thing to Hershey’s Peanut Butter and Chocolate spread. Due to the fact I am on Slimming World (5.5lbs down last week btw) I am banned from the spread ergo the hugs are getting a battering.

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My Easter egg equivalent (see, it’s a problem)

A number of years ago I was going to a training course with my then work. It was in Enniskillen and we were LATE. I am notoriously early to any and all appointments so I was pissed but worse than being pissed I was HANGRY. I had skipped breakfast as there was a promise of coffee and scones on arrival (note that at no time was I worried about missing ANY of the training content) and there was a massive risk that due to our tardiness these would have either a) been eaten or b) been cleared away. Needless to say I was past myself.

As we rocked up into the car park, I freed myself from the confines of the bus and bolted towards the reception area. Having never been to the hotel in question before I had zero idea where I was going but when I looked to my left I saw the table of scones and coffee. Score. I ran (yes, ran) towards the table only to be greeted by my senior manager who placed herself between me and the scone table with arms held out, palms up. Even in writing this I can now see how this was CLEARLY a SLOW DOWN gesture. However, I translated this as HUG (which was strange for someone so IN CHARGE OF MY CAREER PROGRESSION) so I continued to run towards her, threw my arms around her, and sort of swung her around to make sure I tended to her uncharacteristically huggy needs yet also moved myself closer to the scones (priorities). It was only when I had done the ‘turn’ manoeuvre and was facing the rest of the bus who had come in behind me did I realise that something was amiss. Obviously as they had been coming in behind me they had witnessed the entire episode unfold and had correctly translated the gesture as SLOW DOWN so needless to say they were HORRIFIED at my lack of social skills as I more or less PICKED OUR BOSS UP AND SWUNG HER AROUND. I put it down to hunger induced mania. We still talk about it to this day. What astounds me is that I can’t remember within 2 seconds of leaving the house if I locked the door but I can remember every detail of that event in glorious technicolour.

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Actual me – ps follow @medievalreacts

The reason I bring this up is because I had a similar incident last week. My friend introduced me for the first time to her boyfriend and as he was leaving I think I may have misinterpreted his ‘hand shake’ gesture as a hug invitation. Needless to say all my social cues were thrown out the window and I gave him a squish. Again, it was only when I turned to look at my other friend that I realised I may have once more completely disregarded any prior knowledge of body language. It was one of those ‘time standing still’ moments that lasted for the entire 12.5 hour shift I was about to start, overnight, with no one else to compare notes with apart from the only other human who had seen the incident and remains #TEAMHANDSHAKE.

I text my friend in all caps and asked her to apologise to her BF if I gave him an accidental hug and also felt the need to say “IT’S A PROBLEM I HAVE” which now, on reflection, seems a tad extreme. She sent back many cry laughing emojis but I have now realised that this did not say whether or not I had actually misinterpreted….. It shall forever remain a mystery as too much time has passed for me to ask again without looking like I have been having cold sweat flashback concerns….

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So there you have it. I just really felt the need to share that with everyone. Please let me know in the comments if you have ever had an episode where you have accidentally hugged another human. I need to know that I am not alone in this plight. I’ll be right here going through a catalogue of all of the hugs I have ever given to reassure myself that 99% were reciprocal. Accidental Hugging #thehuggleisreal……

Where have you been?

Hello again my buddies! I must apologise for my lack of communication. Sometimes real life gets super hectic but I MUST get better at not neglecting my blog. I’d like to start off first of all by thanking everyone involved in the DANI Awards 2017. To be shortlisted with Siobhan, Gemma and Emer was an absolute dream and a huge congratulations to Siobhan for a well deserved win!

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In that vein I have decided to get back on the blog horse and ride it weekly. I am making a commitment to myself and to you to update at least once a week. Ooof speaking of commitments, I kinda reneged on the old Body Coach plan. I gave it a good go, but my issue is that I truly cannot see myself sticking to that plan forever – I need just a little bit more flexibility. The good thing is that in starting the plan I was made super aware of how horrendous my eating has been and just how huge a change I would need to make to actually become a ‘healthy eater.’ I didn’t want to give up altogether so, I went back to Slimming World. Don’t worry, this isn’t going to become all about “my journey” because that would bore me to write so I can only begin to imagine how it would feel to read. But in saying that if anyone wants to hear more about how I am trucking along, you can always contact me or hit me up on the old Twittery Twat @lindslikedthat!

I’ve been working on quite a few different projects, all of which are equally as exciting and each one is completely different. My real life job is settling well and I am enjoying working with lots of new faces. I know I have said it before but, for real, it is AMAZING how different things can be if you only give yourself some time. So many good things have happened and I am surrounded on a daily basis by the most amazing and inspiring humans I have ever known. Plus, did I mention that my blog was SHORTLISTED FOR A DANI AWARD?? I mean, I would have NEVER imagined that to be possible. Plus I would never have started the blog had it not been for my insanely talented friend Lynne (she’s kind of a big deal)

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I know how horrible it is to be in the dark place with no sign of any form of light at the end of the proverbial tunnel, but believe me, it comes. Sometimes you have to do the things that scare you the most to get out of it, but it’s all worth it. I promise. Let me know what amazing things have happened for you since I have been away? Leave me a comment or tweet me! I’m off work today so I’m about to lose myself in an internet black hole of witchery and make-up tutorials. OMG I HAVE BOUGHT SO MUCH MAKE UP. I’m gonna do a blog post on that alone….. L xx